CAUTION – Some of the content and images used in this article may be considered unsuitable for viewing at work (NSFW)

The Sex Toy Institute

In this blog post, I’m going to share everything you need to know about how to buy the right size dildo to suit your body

Some of the important things you just have to know and which I will explain in detail are:

  • Is your dildo going to be for vaginal or anal use.
  • The length of the dildo
  • The circumference or girth of the dildo
  • The shape of the dildo

How to choose the right size dildo for a girl
Bigger is not always better!

Dildos are one of the most frequently bought sex toys. But making sure you buy the right size dildo for your body means you have to understand a few ‘dildo basics’.

As you’re probably aware, dildos come in many shapes and sizes. Just figuring out the right size dildo to buy can be a bit scary!

In the adult entertainment industry, they tend to go for larger-sized dildos. The reason simply is that the performers are professionals who have spent many years training their bodies to accommodate larger than average dildos. If you have ever watched porn involving the use of dildos you will know exactly what I mean.

If you haven’t watched any of these videos, I suggest you do! I never stop being amazed at the creativity of some performers. They can use a dildo to make themselves squirt, almost on cue!

Despite whatever size dildo, your partner wants you to try, don’t think you can compete with the professionals, at least when you are starting out.

If you are new to using dildos or even if you have a bit of experience, I can assure you, going for a large dildo is not a good idea – trust me, bigger is not always better!

If you want to buy the right size dildo for your specific needs and body, read on as this is the article for you!

Is Your Dildo for Vaginal or Anal Use?

The first thing you need to decide is whether you want to buy the right size dildo for your vagina or your anus.

Typically, dildos for vaginal use are bigger than dildos used for anal play. However, you would not believe the size of some dildos that both male and females insert into their bodies!

The main difference between a dildo used vaginally and one used for anal pleasure is that the right-sized dildo for anal use must have a flange on the end. This is to prevent the dildo going too far up the anal passage.

If you want to avoid a late night trip to the Emergency Department of your local hospital, make sure any dildo you buy for anal satisfaction has a sizable bit on the end to hold it. (this prevents it from ‘disappearing’.)

Many dildos even come with ‘testicles’ on the end for this very reason!

Choosing a dildo can be very confusing. After you finish reading this article, be sure to check out my complete beginner’s guide to dildos.

Dildo with Testicles (2)
Dildo with Flange
Dildo with Testicles
Dildo with Testicles

The Basics Of Buying the Right Size Dildo

Length

The first thing to remember is that the overall length of the dildo you choose will be different from the insertable length. (let’s face it, the bit that goes inside you is far more important than the overall size of the dildo itself!)

As I mentioned above, most dildos have an end to hold them by. This can be in the form of a flange or in many cases, imitation testicles.

If you’re looking at a picture of a dildo that says it is (an eye-watering) 12 inches long, that doesn’t mean you will have to accommodate all that in your vagina or anus. You’ll still need something to hold on to!

So what is the right size dildo length for you?

Let’s start with something you can probably relate to, the average penis length.

We ran a survey of our readers to see what they thought was an average-sized penis. It turns out either they all have porn stars for boyfriends or the guys who responded just can’t stand admitting they have an average-sized dick.

So if you want something accurate to compare against, the average length of an erect penis is between 5.1 inches and 5.5 inches

If you have a current partner and you feel you would like your dildo to be a bit bigger, measure your partners erect penis! There’s every chance he might think you’re being a bit weird so tell him you can’t believe how big he is and you want to be able to brag to your girlfriends!

If you’re looking for a more conventional comparison chart, have a look at the images below.

Dildo Size Chart 12 inch
Dildo Size Chart 8 inches

When considering the right size dildo length, it is worth remembering the vagina is quite shallow compared to the anus. You can accommodate a considerably longer dildo in the anus compared to the vagina.

However, when it comes to deciding on the right size dildo width or girth, the situation changes quite dramatically!

Width/Girth

Ok, this one is more important. If you get this wrong by going too big, you are going to possibly be in a world of pain, (well at least for a little while until you get used to it!)

The first thing to be aware of is if you are looking for the right size dildo for vaginal use, the longer the dildo, the wider it is going to be.

Anal dildos can be longer than vaginal dildos but are typically thinner than vaginal dildos.

Anal style Dildo
Anal Style Dildo
Vaginal Dildo
Vaginal Style Dildo

To give you some idea, the average penis width is 1.5 inches and the girth or circumference of the average dildo ranges from 1″ – 2″.

Getting the right size dildo width is very important as it is the thickness that will give you the most pleasure. Not wide enough and you may as well be putting a pencil in a toilet roll! Too big and it will be uncomfortable to say the least!

I have always worked on the principle that you can’t go wrong if you start out small and build up the larger sizes. As a guideline, a width of 1″ is easily accommodated by most women.

If you are a newbie to all of this and you have never had penetrative sex, definitely go with the smaller width. If you have had twins by natural childbirth, you can probably afford to be a bit more adventurous!

Finally, the width or girth of your dildo will determine the circumference. This is the measurement that determines how ‘full’ you are going to feel when it is inserted in you.

My personal choice is to buy the right size dildo to fill and stretch me just a bit.

Measuring Yourself for The Right Size Dildo.

Yellow Tape measure

If you’re still a bit unsure about the right size dildo that’s best for your body, I will give you a couple of ways to ensure you don’t buy a dildo that is too small or too large.

Hand Measuring Technique

Firstly the length is not that important because if you end up with a dildo that is a bit longer than necessary, you just won’t insert it quite as far.

The width/girth is going to be the deciding factor. For this method, you will need a flexible tape measure, a pair of food preparation gloves, some lubricant, and the fingers of a partner. If you don’t have a tape measure handy, you can print one out here

Lie on your back as relaxed as possible ( a few drinks might help!) Get your partner to put some lubricant on their gloved fingers and start with one finger. Most women can accommodate that fairly easily so then see how many more fingers they can insert. This technique works for vaginas and anal measurement.

Get them to push their fingers in as far as is comfortable for you and get them to note where it becomes uncomfortable.

finger Measurement Technique
Using fingers as a measuring tool

Wrap the tape measure around the position on your partner’s hand, where your vagina or anus reached its stretch limit. Take note of the measurement. Hey, presto you have the maximum circumference of the right size dildo for you!

Bottle Measuring Technique

My second technique for finding the right size dildo to match your body is a bit less refined but very simple!

Take an empty, smooth, long-necked wine or beer bottle, use a bit of lube if necessary, and using one hand, insert the bottle as far into your vagina or anus as feels comfortable.

When you have reached your comfort limit, use your other hand and an art pen to mark on the neck of the bottle, the point where the circumference (width) was as much as you could take.

Use a tape measure to measure around the neck of the bottle at the point you have marked. That will equal the maximum circumference of the right size dildo for you.

Bottle Measuring technique
Measuring with Bottles

If you can insert either of the two bottle sizes to their halfway mark, just about any size dildo will be the right size dildo for you!

Bonus Tip:

To get an idea of what length and width of dildo you can accommodate, visit your local greengrocer! Vegetables such as carrots, zucchinis, daikon, sweet potato etc. can make excellent ‘rulers’.

Carrot and tape measure

How to Choose the Right Size Dildo for Your Body

Ok, so you have the measurements that your body can accommodate, now it’s time to choose the dildo that will be the right size for you.

We know the average penis is 5.1 – 5.5 inches long and approximately 1.5 inches wide so that is your starting point. Do you want to go bigger or the same?

One of the main reasons I use a dildo is because it is bigger than my boyfriend. That said, bigger is not always better and if you’re a bit new to the world of dildos, you might want to start with an average penis size dildo. You can always work up to bigger dildos later (I know you’ll want to – trust me!)

Choosing the Length

Reputable online retailers of dildos will always show the total length and the insertable length.

I doubt you would buy a dress online without knowing its size and the same goes for dildos.

If you have a deep vagina, then feel free to experiment with something longer than the average penis. For those of us who are not so physically blessed, better to stick with what you know will fit comfortably.

If you are looking for a G spot experience then a shorter dildo would be a better bet.

Personally, the right size dildo for me fills me up and at the same time, stretches my vagina and all the nerve ending around it. An added bonus is my boyfriend just loves watching my body devour it.

Of course, if you are going for an anal dildo, length is not a problem. I’ve actually seen a 24-inch anal dildo completely disappear.

Choosing the Width/Girth

Again, reputable retailers of dildos always show the width and circumference of the dildos they sell.

If you have done your measuring as per my methods above you can be reasonably confident the dildo you purchase will be the right size dildo to suit your size body.

There is always going to be a slight difference between manufacturers’ sizes, same as there is in clothing. But an inch is an inch so if the stated circumference is say 5 inches, it going to be pretty close to that size.

Anal dildos are typically smaller in width and circumference than dildos used in the vagina. I say typically because I have seen dildos the size of fists inserted anally. (I’ve also seen a few actual fists do the same thing!)

Caroline Explains how To Choose the Right Size Dildo

Bettystoybox.com is one of the reputable dildo retailers we recommend

Right Size Dildo Shape

Finally, you’ll want to choose a dildo that is the right shape for what you are trying to achieve.

If you just want a dildo that simulates having normal sex, then by far the most common dildo is one in the shape of a penis. But as I have discussed earlier in this blog post, the size can vary considerably.

If you’re looking primarily for g spot stimulation, then you will want a shorter, curved dildo of which there are many on the market.

Some women I know just love the idea of filling their vaginas with the fattest dildo they can find just to see how wide they can stretch themselves (don’t knock it until you have tried it!)

A bit of trial and error can be involved but it shouldn’t take long to figure out the right shape and right size dildo, to satisfy your sexual appetite!

Frequently Asked Questions

My Final Advice

Stick to the guidelines I have laid out. Even if your boyfriend thinks he’s a porn star in bed, chances are you’re not, so don’t allow him to decide what the right size dildo will be for you.

Bigger is not always better, start out with a size you know you can accommodate by using my measuring techniques above and work up from there.

Try different positions and angles to see what works best for you. Get your partner involved if you want. Show them what you like, get them to do it and you can just lay back and enjoy yourself.

Don’t be scared to try something different. You don’t have to be the same as everybody else. Buy the right size dildo to suit your particular desires, not anybody else’s.

Remember, sex is meant to be satisfying and enjoyable, so have fun with your dildo!


Kandi

Kandi Anderson

With over 10 years experience in all aspects of the adult entertainment industry, I know an awful lot about sex toys and how to use them!

Everything from toys for personal pleasure to toys for BDSM, I’ve been there and done that!

As a director, producer and sometimes performer, you can be sure the advice I give is factual and honest.

I share with you the industry’s professional tips and secrets so you can have the most erotic experience possible!